Well today started early, baby girl woke up crying at 1am but it was a great moment when my oldest daughter did not get up to help her but let Mami do the job. I rocked her & put her back sleep & she woke up again in 2hrs, so she came & slept with Mami.
The kids are up by 6am every morning & ready to go. We make breakfast together as a family which has been working out really well because in guarantees that they will eat it. We then got ready quickly & headed to the park early today because the doctor was coming to the house to do the physicals for the kids for their records. The park went okay, our older two boys are still struggling a lot with listening & rebuilding the relationship afterwards. But we are trying to stay strong & remind them that we love them so much & that they are our family.
For example today our oldest son kicked his ball into the street & everytime before we play with the balls we remind them that if it goes in the street then they can´t play with it anymore. While I was sitting with him I told him that I love him, that he is smart & handsome. After each phrase I get a very rude, “no”. FRUSTRATION!! But I remember he has 7yrs of life before I knew him & I have to remember “his story”. The kids have begun trying to play us against us or punish us by asking for help from Tia Lorena, & Lauren has been fabulous of saying immediately “no” you need to go to Papi y Mami.
The kids did great for the doctor, they were polite & listened very well. All are healthy, they are a little under weight & Darth needs some medicine for her heavy breathing. Since they did so good for the doctor we told them that we had a surprise for them afterwards, we made lunches & bagged them up & headed to the park. Lunch was good & they all did great, we had a few “I didn´t get my way & I don´t like Mami or Papi anymore,” but I am told that is part of being a parent.
After lunch we went with the family that we had met on Sunday at the park to a mall just outside of Bogota. The kids did really well, we had to walk through the entire mall & I´ve never seen such big eyes. These poor kids, this was not a great idea that we had. Don´t get me wrong it was beautiful & the family was so kind but it was SO much for their bodies to try to take in. We came to a huge wooden ship surrounded by sand that the kids can play on & I can remember working at the YMCA & our kids would have been all over it. My kids walked around it several times, went up twice, my youngest boy did not go on the ship at all. In the end we played as a family in the sand facing away from the ship.
Sometimes I forget that it´s only day 6, I forget about the years before they were with us. At the mall today I remembered. My kids do not laugh easily, smiles do not rest on their faces, the smallest thing shuts them down. And I have to be okay with that, we have to meet them on their level & allow them the time to process this change.
Also please pray for me specifically, Tyler got onto me tonight & said, “you have to stop expecting the worst & living in fear.” Gotta love when God puts you with the right person. Oh friends sometimes I do, I think about the million ways I can mess this up, I think about the million things that could go wrong, & I do I live in fear…I live in sin. Headed to the Word for some reassurance.
Funny story of the day: a dog came up to our picnic & Darth began grunting at it pretty aggressively. The dog barked & Darth returned with a bark too. Needless to say the dog didn´t get any food 🙂
At the dinnermesa,