Can I be completely honest with you? I was a bit of a drama queen today & my sweet family had to put up with it. I woke up feeling pretty crummy so Tyler & Lauren offered to take the kids to the park & let me rest, I immediately agreed (selfish). But within 5 minutes my two oldest boys decided following directions would not be happening & they would be staying home with Mami instead of going to the park. Part of me wanted to yell out,”wait I´ll go to the park, I wanted the easy job!” but I had made my bed & needed to lie in it, mostly becaue I had not changed out of my pjs yet.
It was a very hard morning. Two boys angry, mad at me, mad at each other & possibly regretting this whole family thing they got signed up for. I realized that I had not smiled or told my kids that I love them for about two hours…bad mom award! When Tyler & Lauren came back from the park my attitude had not changed. Both boys were still pretty grumpy & I was still feeling pretty crummy. While the children were eating & preparing for our afternoon I went to the bathroom to brush my teeth (first time that day, gross!) & change out of my pajamas. I got on my knees & asked God for a miracle, to bring us home sooner, to make my life easier….again selfish.
I remembered about the privelege it is to be a parent & got a better attitude (not a great one but a better one). Then God stepped in…
As we were heading back to the park, thankfully all of us were getting to go, everyone was following instructions we were stopped at the bottom of the elevator by a young woman. I wanted to say “can´t you see I have 5 restless kids that are just moments away from not listening & I´ll have to spend another hour in the apartment with them!” Then she proceeded to tell me that she is an adoptee from the same orphanage that my children are from & she gave me some amazing advice. She said, Ï love my adopted parents but I wish they would have made my city & my culture a priority in my life, I am now dealing with the feelings of being a Colombian who grew up in a white world.” Wow! I have to embrace my children´s city, I have to allow them this culture & their past to be a part of their present. I have to stay in Bogota until God is ready for me to go home.
So I told God that´s enough, I´ll change my attitude & be happy! But He wasn´t done. At the park we brought chalk & begain coloring & tracing each other & another little girl asked if she could play with us. We said yes & her parents asked us why we speak English & our kids are speaking Spanish, they look like us. :). The family proceeded to tell us that they live in the area, 3 minutes from our apartment, that they are bilingual, & about tons of kid friendly places we can take the kids & they offered to take us out on Tuesday with their family. They were so kind & gave us so much encouragement in saying that our kids are so well behaved & how hard it is to raise just one. I don´t know if you remember the earlier part in the blog but I asked for a miracle, God just granted me a miracle. It feels so lonely in this city & having a family go out of their way to help us, amazing! As we were playing more another woman came up & again asked why we speak English & our children speak Spanish. When she found out that we had adopted all of them she said she could see God´s love in our actions. I am so very thankful she could not see my selfish actions only hours before!
One more miracle, the kids were doing so well at the park & we were in no mood to cook dinner because the kitchen was still a wreck from lunch so we decided to eat out, in a restaurant, with 5 kids…crazy! They did so great we went to a pizza place & the kids did great all were polite, ate well & listened to Papi y Mami. Don´t get me wrong we left the place a mess & at least two of them cried but we were a family, we said our prayer, ate together & passed plates politely.
Please keep us in your prayers, I am still scared & nervous but my goodness I do love these kids!
A funny note from Tyler: our youngest son gets hurt everytime we go to the park! Yesterday he got a huge knot on his head when he got off of the swing & today while climbing trees with dad, he jumped off & as he did a dog ran underneath him & he banged his head on the dog´s, don´t worry the dog was fine but the poor kid definitely got a bloody nose. To which his Papi said, “¡Sangre en las calles!”
At the dinnermesa,